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Alien Believer - Been Probed And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt T-Shirt

CultSub

$23.99

FUN STUFF

Alien abductions and probing have become quite the cliché these days, but that is not to say the stories are untrue! Although we've noted alien abductions and probing mentions in some of our favorites including South Park, Twilight Zone, Outter Limits and Supernatural—we at CultSub believe (in SOME of the stories).

Yes, alien anal probing has become...ahem...THE BUTT of many jokes. Hell, even Weird Al Yankovic sang about the need for tinfoil hats “in case an alien’s inclined / to probe your butt or read your mind" in his 2014 song “Foil.” (Check it out. It's quite catchy.) However, at CultSub we'd like to think that something greater than ourselves exists...somewhere...out there in the great unknown. After all, there is so much we do not know.

Speaking on which, do you know anything about the first publicized alien abduction? It occurred on Sept. 19, 1961 when Barney Hill and his wife Betty were driving home to Portsmouth, New Hampshire. The couple saw a bright object following their car, and when they arrived home they were unable to account for two hours of the night and feeling that "something terrible" had happened to them. We can't seem to find any information on how long it took for them to recall what happened, but we do know it "took a while." Their story, which they told first to a psychiatrist (then in a book and TV movie), seems to serve as a template for countless abduction stories to follow.

Details vary, but the typical alien abductee experiences the script of the Hills’ self-reported encounter: They are taken by otherworldly beings, subjected to various experiments, and returned, never to be the same. Interestingly, Barney and Betty Hill's story came about AFTER aliens started kidnapping people in movie and TV plot lines in the late 1950s. Reports of flying saucers surfaced in the late 1940s; aliens were fixtures of science fiction by the dawn of the 20th century. However, people reporting they've been spirited away by such beings is only as old as the Hills. However, some 2.5% of the US population reports having some personal experience with alien abduction. Studies by sober-minded, non-ufologist psychologists have identified two truths that apply to most people in this unique cohort, including the Hills. They’re not lying, at least not consciously. Most people who say they were kidnapped by aliens really believe they were kidnapped by aliens, even if the evidence doesn’t support their claim.

“We in the late 20th century may well be in the exciting position of being able to observe and study a myth in the process of being created,” wrote English professor Terry Matheson in his 1998 book Alien Abductions: Creating a Modern Phenomenon. An annual meeting of alien abductees convenes in Rhode Island; support groups for abductees—or “experiencers,” as many prefer to be called—thrive online. In honor of World UFO Day (July 2), it’s worth taking a look back at the point where all their stories began. We'd be interested to here your thoughts and where you stand. All we can say right now is that we want to learn more.

SIZE & FIT

CultSub Gildan Size Chart

PRODUCT + PRINTING

  • Super soft n’ comfy premium T-shirt brands (Bella + Gildan).
  • DGT printed (“Direct-To-Garment”) using fancy ink jet tech.
  • All shirts are pre-shrunk! Wash inside out w/ care for max wear.
  • Solid Colors: 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton.
  • Heather Colors: 100% Airlume combed, ring-spun cotton and polyester.
  • Side-seam construction for better fit.
  • Shoulder-to-shoulder taping for durability.
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Gender:
Unisex
Age Group:
Adult